4 Questions in 4 Days That Strengthen Teams and Elevate Performance – Pt. 2
The tyranny of the urgent sucks the life out of your best self. You get lost in results. People are tools. Relationships become burdens.
Today’s question: How do you want to show up today?
If you forget about pressure, stress, falling short, disappointments, fear, or external expectations, how do YOU choose to show up?
“Don’t wants” are easier than “Do wants”.
When you ask someone what they want, they tell you what they don’t want.
Perhaps you don’t want to show up …
- Weak.
- Confused.
- Uncertain.
- Closed.
- Isolated.
- Negative.
- Fearful.
- Angry.
- Worried.
- Distracted.
Your best self lurks behind the self you don’t want.
Suppose you don’t want to be confused and uncertain. Choose to show up curious or forward-facing. Distracted translates to present. Negative might be solution oriented.
Intention to behavior:
Behavior brings intention to life.
Imagine your best self at work. What are you actually doing or saying? Imagination is the beginning. If you can’t imagine it, you can’t do it.
Imagine your best self is present, not distracted. When someone approaches, what might you do? Smile. Look them in the eye. Put your cell phone in your pocket.
With:
You go further when you have a “with”. Tell trusted colleagues how you plan to show up today.
Declarations establish accountability, add fun, and strengthen resolve.
I’m showing up hopeful. For me, hopeful is being in charge of myself. It includes keeping my head up and my shoulders back. It’s humbling to declare it. Several friends know my intention. We’ll discuss what I’m learning.
One thing:
Choose one way to show up and practice it all day. Options include:
- Vibrant.
- Curious.
- Present.
- Optimistic.
- Accountable.
- Tough.
- Transparent.
How do you want to show up today?
What behaviors express your intention?
Other posts in the “4 Questions” series:
Part 1: What small wins might you celebrate today?
Part 3: What decision do you/we need to make?
Part 4: What would you like to do a little more of next week?
“The tyranny of the urgent sucks the life out of your best self. You get lost in results. People are tools. Relationships become burdens.” hits the nail on the head for me. I would say I am a very outgoing social person, however when I am at work, it is a different story. I tend to become driven on my work and caught up in the busyness of the demands, where I forget that the people I am talking with and obtaining information from are still people with lives and families. One of my close friends used to work at the same company and would call almost everyday to have a chat for few minutes. I would find myself not answering or forcing myself to answer in the midst of the work around me. I do not want to be that way. I do not want to feel like people are a burden, I am not that way. Your work environment tends to drive who you are, when it should be the other way around. Who you are should drive your work environment. Take back the control. Choose to show up wanting to get to know people, be curious about who you work with, ask questions about their lives…you may find out you have more in common and can build a friendship. The work will be there when you get back.
Hi Jenna. Thanks for your transparency. We need more leaders who are willing to acknowledge that it takes focused attention to bring our best selves. If not, we slip into doing machines.
A little thought helps us realize that connected teams and organizations perform better than disconnected people. The strength of our organizations is reflected in the strength of our connections.
If we aren’t careful, we leave our best selves at the curb when we walk into work.
Best wishes with your studies.
The cultivation of relationships at work often result in promotional considerations in the future.
Well said, Jim.
“Imagine your best self at work. What are you actually doing or saying? Imagination is the beginning. If you can’t imagine it, you can’t do it.”
This seems so basic but it’s helpful to be reminded how powerful this is and we get so lost in the day-to-day that we forget to do this. I’m going to strat practicing this every morning. Thanks!