Disability-Friendly Holidays
Planning for holidays that are accessible and welcoming for people with disabilities isn’t a “special” effort, or a niche concern. Nearly every family includes people with some kinds of disabilities. Nearly everyone has at least one friend, coworker, or neighbor with a disability.
It could be a mobility impairment – someone who uses a cane, crutches, wheelchair, or mobility scooter. It could be some degree of vision or hearing loss — either lifelong or related to illness, accident, or age. It might be a cognitive disability – like Down Syndrome, autism, learning disabilities, traumatic brain injury, Alzheimer's Disease, or more general age-related memory or intellectual disabilities. Many people who may not identify as “disabled” nevertheless experience significant chronic pain or illness – which can affect how long they can tolerate events comfortably, and whether they feel safe being with others, especially as COVID and other seasonal infections remain an issue. And holidays can be especially difficult for people with mental illness, especially when they are related to family trauma.
There are dozens of very specific ways to make holidays more accessible and inclusive. Here are three basic steps to get you started:
1. Invite disabled family, friends, and coworkers.
Don't assume disabled people can't or won't want to participate in family gatherings, shopping trips, community events, or office parties. When in doubt, invite them. And don't worry too much if they say no.
At the same time, make sure you are fully prepared for disabled people to accept your invitation. Remember that a cheerful welcome isn't worth much to a disabled friend, family member, or coworker without accessibility and effective accommodations.
2. Plan holiday events that are accessible and accommodating.
Accessiblity means designing spaces to accommodate disabled people's known needs, seamlessly and with the greatest possible independence. Wheelchair users need entrances without steps, wide pathways to maneuver indoors, and a safe, accessible place to go to the bathroom. People with visual or hearing impairments need effectively adapted communication, and a dose of consideration from others, in order to participate fully and avoid ending up isolated and lonely in a festive crowd. People with cognitive impairments need understanding, an open mind about expected social behaviors, and a genuine spirit of respect and inclusion.
Accommodating means being prepared to change and adjust gracefully to new or unanticipated needs. “Reasonable accommodations” aren’t just for workplaces. You need to be willing to change plans and methods at a moment’s notice when someone's disability flares up, or they run into unexpected access problems. In these situations it’s usually okay to “make do” with less than ideal accommodations, if they get the job done. The most important thing is to listen to what disabled people are asking for, and respond positively to specific requests for help, without making a fuss.
An essential first step in planning disability-friendly holiday events is to check the places you want to hold them for accessibility, and be an annoying stickler about it when necessary. A single shallow step can be as much of a barrier as a whole flight of stairs. An accessible restroom blocked by junk in the hallway is worse than useless to someone with literally no other choice. The true test of inclusiveness is when it's difficult, not when it's easy. You may have to choose a different bar or restaurant because of physical barriers, or give up the honor of hosting the party in your own house if someone else’s home is more accessible. Resist the powerful temptation to compromise on basic accessibility.
3. Give gifts that make disabled people's lives easier and more enjoyable.
Consider giving adaptive products. Some are made specifically for people with disabilities – like wheelchairs, walkers, bathroom adaptations, or communication devices. Others are sold “off the shelf” to all customers, but designed in ways that make them easier to use and especially useful for disabled people. This includes everything from magnifiers and easy grip kitchen utensils, to smartphones capable of making all sorts of communication and household automations more accessible.
Another gift idea is to come up with creative ways to provide flexible financial assistance to people with disabilities who may have a harder time making everyday ends meet, or investing in major purchases. Give gift certificates to restaurants, favorite specialty stores, or all-purpose shopping sites. Or, buy annual memberships for favorite TV streaming channels, or shopping and home delivery services. Online purchasing of all kinds makes it easier than ever to make a one-time gift – other than just a wad of cash – that makes a disabled person’s life a little bit richer and more secure over the coming year.
And don’t overlook luxuries. Necessities are important and often much appreciated. But while many disabled people have enough to get by with essentials, purchases simply for pleasure can be out of reach. Consider giving things that a disabled person with very carefully balanced finances may enjoy, but can't include in their regular budget – like premium foods and beverages, movie or concert tickets, home decorations, or hobby supplies.
Above all, think about the specific person you are giving to, not just their disability. Will they appreciate a gift related to their disability, and something they can use? Or, would they prefer something purely fun and decadent?
The most important way to make your holiday events more accessible and welcoming to people with disabilities is to listen to the disabled people in your life. Do your best to accommodate their needs and wishes, in a spirit of authentic generosity. At the same time, don't get too invested in your brilliant idea. And don't count on a holiday gift or experience to change a disabled person's life, or be appreciated exactly the way you imagine.
In other words, don’t be inclusive to make yourself feel good. Do it because including disabled people is as essential to your holidays as cookies, gingerbread, and eggnog.
